I am at a loss. I *wrongly* assumed that as I got older I would be better at understanding the world. I figured I would have a better feel to how people think and act and how we all fit together in the idyllic puzzle of society.
Unfortunately, I am continuously proven wrong. This optimistic view of the world is full of fallacies. What’s annoying is no matter how many times I’m shown the cold, hard proof of its faulty nature, I look the other way and my selective goldfish memory takes over.
People will disappoint you. That’s a fact of life. My thinking defaults to giving the benefit of the doubt to the common man no matter the bungled reasoning; which results in my surprise. Surprise is a silly thing. It’s unexpected. Even when, logically, I know what to expect, I’m thrown for a loop.
We can take this surprise in a multitude of ways. How we choose to receive this is what defines who we are. No one has all the answers. If you know someone who does, please introduce me to them, because that’s incredible. Barring some made up omniscient being, we are all faced with the unknown and unexpected situations on a regular basis. How we respond to external factors writes the story of who we are.
We all have choices everyday to make. The unknown and unexpected nature of the outcomes is what gives life its excitement. When confronted with a decision, we have many options on how to proceed. There are countless factors to consider; the wellbeing of ourselves, the feelings of others, financial outcomes, emotional weight, and many more.
In light of all of the stimuli informing our decisions, we ultimately choose to do something or nothing. We rarely know how this will affect us moving forward. That’s where the fear of action comes from.
But fear is not always bad. Fear can get you into wonderful situations. Fear is a natural feeling that we all deal with and is normal when living life to the fullest. Fear is a part of life that can lead to fulfillment. Forcing yourself to do things that scare you is balance, but once you find it, can lead to a beautiful stay on this rock.
On the flip side is regret. Regret is a nasty contagion that infects you with its demoralizing tendrils that wrap around your head and heart. It causes you to double think and continuously hesitate when acting on the unknown. Previous actions are the best predictor of future actions. Once a theme is established in one’s decisions, it can be difficult to separate from it.
This internal fight gives us purpose. No matter what we’ve done in the past, free will gives us the ability to change. The ability to make these decisions day to day is what breathes electricity into our souls. We are never trapped by our past no matter how stiff the proverbial prison cell is built in our minds. There is always time to change for the better.
However, don’t try to bet on how others will act. Each of us all have the similarly difficult decisions to make. We are all simultaneously more connected and less connected than ever before. Trying to figure out how someone thinks is arduous at best.
I will continue to give people the benefit of the doubt. While it may cause me strife on the road that I call life, I prefer to maintain the hope that people are making decisions for good overall, even in light of the news and themes of the current zeitgeist.
Continue to find the balance of fear, action and optimism in your day to day life. Control what you can in your realm of control. Be the change you hope to see in the world.